Checking In

this is beginning to suck great big old buckets. when i reloaded my os i decided not to go through all those pesky microshit updates & i'm having so many issues that i think i'm gonna have to go ahead & start that project. the updates are still in my folders they just aren't recognized in my add/remove programs. they were there before so i know they should be there. unfortunately, microsoft doesn't support 98se anymore so its not as easy as going to their homepage & having it done automatically. lots of fun to be had.
the main reason i stopped in was not to bitch but to update you on luckys' progress. she had to have a complete hysterectomy. turned out she had a tumor on her ovary the size of a tennis ball & one growing inside her uterus that was 10 centimeters wide. thats about the size of a babys head. she had 24 staples & they cut her from just under her boobs all the way down to the top of her hair...down there. she's out of the hospital & everything is looking good for right now. hopefully, she doesn't lose her mind in this change of life thing she's facing now.
i'll be back later. i'm messing with this stupid printer for right now. i can get pinks. nothing else out of the color cartridge...just pinks. any suggestions? i've cleaned them both with the self cleaning & i've used hot water. i can blow color out of the nozzle but it just won't print color. one color did come out really sludgy & i'm wondering if adding water to that well may help. if you have an idea feel free to shout out.
later.

Nutcases In The Woodwork

wow, its early on fathers day. so, happy fathers day to all of you fantastic fathers out there. guess i should send a card to my sperm donor. he's never been much of a father so cards are kinda hard to choose. its easier to adapt an ecard fathers day card to meet my needs. on the other hand i tend to spoil sonny. i bought him the cutest helium balloon & a gift card to buy him a pair of boots. the only reason i bought a gift card was the dummy couldn't tell me what size he wore anymore. i figured he could just go & try on the boots & get the pair he wants. if theres extra money to get a few other things thats fine too. i just want to make him happy. poor kid doesn't get a lot of happiness in his life these days. at least not what he deserves. that psychobitch he lives with is just not deserving of him. he had a friend that gave him tickets to the speedway this weekend & goofy bitch called me tonight to tell me that sonny got pissed & left her there. too bad it wasn't forever but she did get a ride back home & sonny had just pulled in when i hung up with her. apparently it was a great night until they got ready to leave & then she got upset over something (i never got the details on what upset her) but it caused him to disappear, leaving her at the gate. i know that sounds bad on his part but if you only knew how crazy this bitch was you'd give him the benefit of the doubt. she probably went off on some girl looking at him & embarrassed the whole crowd within a 20 foot parameter. i know, i've been there when she went off on a jogger that ran across the street & he tried to look in every direction but the jogger & she had a slapping fit over him maybe seeing the jogger & her tight bod. she started smacking herself in the face & shaking her head until i was dizzy. i couldn't believe that she went off like she did & just wanted to crawl in a hole for sonny. the only good thing about this bitch is the grandson i got in the deal. other than that i would give my left arm to get sonny away from her. and believe me he'd give anything to get away from her, too. but they have a son together & he's afraid he can't take care of him by himself. i can only pray that when jammer is a little older sonny will decide to get out of this mess & take his son to raise away from the crazy bitch & her crazy daughter. oh yeah, we've found out this weekend about the crazy daughter that makes jammer take his clothes off in front of her. i can't believe this shit but this has been happening lately. i've threatened that if i hear of this shit going on anymore i'm calling the police & having her removed from the home. i'd hate to have to do that to my son but if his goofy wench can't get her crazy daughter under some kind of control i will take my grandson from both of them & raise him in a loving, protected home. they all have one more chance as far as i'm concerned. if sonny wants to live with that crazy fucking bunch he's a big boy & can handle himself but my grandson is not gonna be fucked up cos nobody has the time to protect him from smack myself silly bitch & fuck me crazy daughter. i'm sorry but i've lost all compassion for these nutcases my son has chosen to live with at this point, i want to put both of them in an insane assylum & be done with them. if ix lays one more hand on jammer i'm not taking her anymore. at least he can come here & be away from the abuse for a few days. honestly, if i hear one more thing about ixxie abusing jammer i will report her & have her removed from the home. jammer is my priority here. he deserves a normal life above & beyond anything else. you know, i've supported my son through a lot of things but i feel more compelled to protect my grandson in this situation. i hope it doesn't come to such a major move but i can't let this one slide. they all get one (1) more chance.
later.

Lost & Found

have you missed me? have you even noticed i've been gone? this is gonna crack you up. i wasn't real pleased, at the time, but its funny now. i fucked my pc up so bad that i had to re-load my operating system & start from scratch. you know i was so tickled with me for getting that stupid scanner going. well, i signed on & wanted to scan jammers diploma's & awards & the stupid scanner couldn't be 'initialized'...whatever the hell that meant. it just pissed me off. so i started investigating. right into a blue screen of death, thank you very much microshit!!!! i opened the scanner software folder. i found a folder that contained dll's & shit like that so i opened it. the message said, 'the dll you are currently using is more current than this...are you sure you want to change'. or something to that effect. i answered 'no, to all'. i guess i should have gone through them one by one cos the next thing i saw was a blue screen that wouldn't do anything. i restarted my pc & got some message about my operating system not being able to load cos i was missing about 20 current dll's. WTF! i said no to all. i choose not to change them. i'm not real sure what happened but i tried opening in safe mode to revert back to a saved backup i had & it said nope, not gonna happen. i tried the scanreg/restore trick & again it said nope, not gonna happen. i couldn't believe that one. i've never had it tell me no, i couldn't use an older saved date. i messed with it for about 3 days & then just gave up & reloaded windows & all my software. one thing i hadn't counted on was microshit knowledge base not supporting my operating system anymore. so, all those patches are no longer available. i reloaded the system in the same folder so everything is actually there but when i run belarc it doesn't recognize them anymore. i don't know if that means i'm still protected or not. but i refuse to go through all those patches & search them out & reload them. i guess i'm just taking my chances on them still being applicable cos they are here. the good news is all my files & pics are still here & i had all the cd's to reload my programs. the bad news is i still refuse to give up on this scanner. I WILL GET IT RUNNING. even if i have to put a toggle switch on it so that it turns on everytime my pc opens. i'm not sure how i'm gonna do it but i will win!! i don't lose well.
later.

Paybacks Are Hell

i don't know how diabetics do it. they poke themselves on the finger to draw blood for testing then poke themselves where ever for a shot. my fingers are so sore i can't hardly type. not to mention my arms are both sore from the shots i've been taking. just about the time one feels better its time for another shot. i have one more to take then its all up to the diet & exercise to undo this pre-diabetic dilemma i've funned myself into. yeah, i know, funned isn't a word but i'm a redneck from southern kentucky. we make up our words as we see fit.
which reminds me of a story my dad told one time. he was talking about his brother & growing up & he said, 'we got into this fit & i clumbed a tree to get away from him'. i always knew my dad wasn't the sharpest tool in the shed but that really made me realize just how dumb the 'fitting clumber' was. which reminds me of a joke my brother brought home from school one day & handed to my dad. on one side was written 'how to keep a pollock busy, turn over'. on the other side was, 'how to keep a pollock busy, turn over'. after about 8 times of turning it over & over he looked up & said, 'i don't get it'. i thought my mom was gonna bust her guts trying not to laugh at the man she adored. while my brother peed his pants laughing & i walked away as fast as i could to not get caught up in the hissy my dad was gonna throw when he realized the joke was on him. i've done some pretty stupid things in my lifetime but making fun of my dad to his face was not one of them.
damn, i need a drink. not drinking is making me remember things i wanted to forget.
like the same summer my brother pulled the pollock prank on dad we were all on this island in the middle of cumberland lake. we were swimming & diving off the cliff having a grand ole time when warden, my little brother, decided he wanted to ski. so off they went pulling him up real close to the island so we could all wave & cheer him on. they circled the island to bring him back around again & while he was showing off he didn't notice he was heading for the side of another boat that was anchored alittle ways out. we all started screaming & flapping our arms trying to get him to look where he was going but he was in his haven. & ran right into the side of the boat. mom dove, i took off running down the hill. my sister was already in the water & we were all heading for warden to see how bad he was hurt. on my way down, this friend of my parents was heading back up the hill. i said, 'lettie, warden just hit the boat. aren't you coming'? she yelled back 'i'm coming. i need my smelling salts'. i thought good idea, he'll probably need it. but when she got to the bank she sat down & started sniffing it. turned out it wasn't for warden. it was for her. she had a tendency to faint at the sight of blood.
when we got warden back to the bank dad sat down next to him. he said very quietly, 'if you ever wanna know how to keep a pollock busy again......just ask me'.
later.

The Graduate

my favorite grandson graduated from kindergarten this week. i bought him a card that congratulated him on his graduation. isn't that the cutest pic? he was so thrilled with himself he couldn't stop with the cheesy smile. he told me he got a 'diploma for graduatin & he got to keep his hat & gown & he won a lot of awards for being so smart & fast'. i love it that he likes school. he loves to learn & he's so excited about learning to read that he tries to spell everything these days. nowhere close to correctly but at least he's trying. he knew his abc's before he started so that was a plus. he learned how to write his name quickly. i'm not just talking his first name either...i mean his whole name & loves to recite the spelling to you as many times in a day as he can. he'd still rather slip on a shoe with a velcro then tie a shoelace though. and he's not so good at drawing. as you can see here with the man watching ducks. this is how he draws all his people & he doesn't have the time to sit & draw a flower or a tree. his dogs, houses & cars are all just a bunch of squares with either stick legs, crooked chimneys or oblong circle tires. i'm not sure but i don't think he'll ever acquire his mommy & daddys talent for drawing. thats ok. at least his man has 5 fingers on one hand, 2 eyes & 2 feet. i mean what else do you want? besides his imagination for watching ducks goes wayyy beyond what he draws. cos, like me, i guess you've noticed there is no ducks in the picture & i'd really like to know what the balloon above the man is supposed to say. i know, maybe he'll be a story teller instead. like me. he does do his best work while flapping his gums.

later.

weirdie mcweirdness

we 're both still dealing with dr. appt for now. i'm on my 3rd of 4 b12 shots & hubby has his stress test scheduled for june 11. i go back for another blood test on the 12th. i've been sticking my finger with a lance for a week now & my blood sugar reading is always around 125. which is slightly high but only slightly. i need to lose at least 20 pounds in the next few months or this friggin dr. is gonna make me quit smoking. i heard about a new medication out that makes it really easy & i'm thinking lose weight first...quit smoking next. theres just no way i can do both at once. hmm, maybe i should start eating my cigarettes. i still get my nicotine & cigarettes can't be very fattening. right? does anybody know the calorie content of a cigarette? i think i'll google that in the near future. as crazy as it sounds you know someone has probaby figured it out.
oh yeah, i hate mechanics btw. i think i should open a mechanic shop. i'll have nothing but women working for me. yeah, we can have men to do the heavy lifting but nothing but women for consulting about your car. i really think i'm onto something here. actually, i don't think i really need men for lifting. there are tools out there that make lifting anything heavy a breeze. it'll cost me a little extra to get it up & running but think of all the women that would come from miles around to have an honest explanation as to what might be wrong with their car. i'll advertise it as the 'no bull just babes' on car therapy. i went directly from work to have the shop check out why my car was shimmying, thumping & shifting hard. hubby wasn't with me. these guys tried to persuade me that it was the new pieces trying to work with the old parts that still needed to be replaced. i mean, what does a new transmission have to mesh with to not shift hard? it is the shifter, right? it either shifts hard or it doesn't. in an automatic car? ok, maybe they know something i don't. then they told me i had a bad tire. they couldn't tell me which one it was. they checked them all out but found nothing to show me was bad about the tires. they are a year old. maybe thats it. year old tires won't work with a new transmission. next they pointed out that i probably needed new motor mounts. huh? a new transmission needs new motor mounts to help it shift smooth? ok. i'm a woman. do i need a new motor with my new transmission cos wouldn't it be easier to just buy a new car? that'll help the shifting be a little smoother, right? you know what i did? i bought a chiltons car manuel. now, by golly, i've got all the diagrams & instructions to just do it my fucking self. motor mounts & newer tires my big, fat lady ass. i was like, ok, guys, just give me one good reason & i won't snicker at your little dicks. so, they finally said, maybe bushings. now, keep in mind the car didn't drive bad with the old transmission, it just leaked, but yes, i will accept that a new transmission needs new bushings. that one i'll buy. and change myself. thank you $818.86 very much. anyway, i'm taking applications for my new auto shop. females only need apply. some knowledge of cars will be necassary. no college degrees needed. cos, women are better bullshitters.
later.

Holding My Breath

& back to the grindstone on tuesday which was a busy, busy day. before i got home from work little sis, lucky, had called to talk to me. her & her friend, roomie had visited last weekend so i didn't think twice about the phone call. until she called back & i heard her voice. she was scared & you could hear it when she talked. my heart jumped into my throat. she told me that she had to be rushed to the hospital on sunday. something in her middle hurt so bad it doubled her over. the hospital took some scans & found a mass in her abdomen. they recommended she see a doctor as soon as possible, gave her some pain killers & sent her on her way. i can't believe the way some hospitals treat people without health insurance. if that had been me they'd have checked me in immediately & started every unnecessary treatment in the world. but i have insurance. she just started a new job & her insurance hasn't kicked in yet. she went to the dr. & he explained that she had a cyst on her oviary that would need to be removed & biopsied before they could tell her anything else. she was recommended to a specialist. the specialist felt around & took some more scans & told her she had 2 cysts. one the size of a tennis ball on her oviaries & another the size of a grapefruit on her uterus. lucky is a little girl. she only weighs about 125 lbs. soaking wet. if these things are that big she probably only weighs about 100 lbs & 25 lbs are masses growing inside of her. the doctor told her these masses are smashing all her other organs & not giving them room to function properly. that explains alot. she looks enimic & has no energy all the time. we've been worried about her for years but she insisted she was fine, just needed more rest. and i thought diabetes was the worst thing in my life. if this turns out to be cancerous...
i can't even finish that thought. right now i'm trying to keep a positive attitude & feed her regularly. she's concentrating on working & trying to keep her mind off of this until she gets the operation.
pray for her.
later.