Tuesday, January 17, 2006

And I Think To Myself

i wish i could do it. i really wish it was that easy. stop my heart, my compassion for a fellow human being & just bitch out!! just sit down & pound out the thoughts that go through my head. i've said before how i could do a '100 reasons why i hate my husband' post and i could do it in under an hour. but he reads this blog. am i really that heartless? i can be really wicked with my tongue & use of some strong vocabulary. especially with someone that i know isn't gonna remember anything i say anyway. to put it down in writing where the world can read it & have him know everyone can read it is almost more than i can bring myself to sting someone. sting my ass, smash, crush, pulverize, ..... but god he makes it almost impossible not to be that mean.
then i think to myself.
1. i hate a drunk.. i hate a drunk that thinks he's the cutest, funniest, most entertaining person in the world. i beg him to sit down, don't entertain, don't talk, don't fall & please, don't puke....shut up when he's drunk & don't, don't, don't. just don't everything. i really get so tired of hearing the same things over & over.
maybe if i did the posts & actually laid it all out for him to see when he's drunk or sober, maybe, just maybe, it would sink in. maybe i'd actually get my wish & he would stop talking to me. nahh, i'd never get that lucky. but i am getting closer to posting those evil thoughts. the thoughts that would make some of you even cross the street to avoid me if you knew what evil treads there.
then i think to myself.
2. what made me go off this time? AGAIN? i sign onto my pc & get a blue screen of I go into safe mode & find a shitload of porn sites. AGAIN. ummmm, what don't you understand that porn on the pc isn't a good thing? when do you realize that this is the people they warn you about. the ones that sew up your computer & put a hurt on you? buy a book, dude. don't fuck with my computer. AGAIN.
damn, guess i just started that list, didn't i?
i can't wait to see where this goes.


Rainex said...

Sometimes you have to
just get the shit out
of your head and deal
with it Lindy. Sorry
your life is hard at this
time-will read avidly for
next installment.

Lindy.. The Alien Keeper said...

Thanks so much for your support Rain. It's because of this support that I actually decided to start spouting the truths.