My Glass IS Half Full

i don't have alot going on these days. my step moms husband was in his 3rd wreck in 2 years. i'm not sure if its his eyes or his ears, both have been going for the last few years. he's had to get hearing aids & he wears glasses but obviously he needs more. the first 2 were just minor accidents & everyone walked away without a scratch. including very little damage done to the cars involved. this time, however, he pulled out in front of a lady doing at least the speed limit which was 50 in the area & really did a number on both vehicles. moms van is totalled & i believe the other ladies van is totalled too. the one good thing is the lady went to the hospital & was released immediately. she couldn't be too hurt but you know how that has a way of coming back to bite you in the ass. on the other hand, her husband was hospitalized with broken bones all over his body & bruised from his head to his toes. mom hasn't been a happy camper lately. she has been doing all the housework, all the yardwork as well as nursing him. lets face it we all know how big a baby a hurt man is. sorry guys, but if the shoe fits...anyway, i think she needs a vacation away from everything. she's on the verge of losing her mind.
i have a question. why is it when you marry someone everything changes? i mean a perfectly matched couple that agrees on everything gets married & overnight, it seems, someone decides to change.
i know i'm sick to death of being the only one making money. do you really think i enjoy working? does anyone out there believe that i hate the fact that someday i will have to retire? in a mere 14 years i will be a prime candidate for retirement. at least by age. of course, the truth is i'll have to work till i die. i'll never be able to prepare a nest egg for retirement. i live from pay check to pay check with no leftovers. how in the hell can i ever consider retiring? at 46 hubby's ready to just sit back & take a ride. albeit a cheap ride cos i don't make that much money but still a ride. do you know how much i would love to just quit work & enjoy getting old with my grandbabies? all the things i could get done if i stayed home all day, everyday? people talk about getting bored but i don't think that would be me. i could always find something to do. i love playing on the computer & for one thing if i had the time to just hang out i would start working on computers for people. theres killer money in that. i love flowers, i could open a greenhouse & sell plants that i started from seeds. i have a story i wrote for my grandkids. and lots of poems i've written over the years. i could write if i had the time. i even thought about being an interior designer when i was younger. i love to match drapes & rugs. i love redecorating houses. there are so many things i could find to do. i even love to cook. god, what i would give.
dreams....just dreams.
later