After The Yule Log

we just got home from christmas dinner with my in-laws. had a great roast dinner with all the trimmings & exchanged gifts. the first christmas since dad passed away. it was hard on mum but she's a tough lady. the best thing is her new granddaughter, k-boo. she's a blessing. i'm not so sure mum could be so strong if it weren't for her.
i painted mats for everyone. they were a big hit. everyone bragged & compared that theirs was the best. i love the personal touch. i think it shows the true meaning of christmas to put your own touch on a gift.
we'll be doing my family on sunday so i'll post all my gifts at once.
we're picking up the kids tomorrow. they'll be opening their gifts tomorrow night.
i've been meaning to find the time between painting & shopping to tell you we got to see the twins last sunday. we all got together at my dads. man, that was a trip! my dad has mellowed so much in the years. i can't remember as a girl ever sitting on my dads lap. it was just something not done. with the twins its so different. they climbed all over him & he just loves on them. its great to see. he actually played baby dolls with them & i can honestly say i've never seen him play dolls with anyone before. i think he's probably happier than he's ever been before. i guess his new wife has been good for him.
well, got a big day planned tomorrow. i need to hit the hay.
hope everyone had a very merry christmas. be safe.
later.

Slow Motion Rewind

note to farmers: i understand you need to haul your crap around from farm to farm but please! put! lights! on! your! trailers!
i had some work done on my car. turned out there was a problem with the bolts that was supposed to hold my calipar in place. like one was missing. so i had this horrible rattle going on in the front end. while the mechanic had my car i borrowed my mother-in-laws car. which really made me nervous anyway. i came to complete stops, looked both ways three times before i pulled out, kept to the speed limit & parked away from all the other cars. i was so careful. the last day i had it i was coming home & i've told you how my road is uphill with a lot of curves. not to mention its now dark when i come home. so i'm coming through the s's up the hill & i'm thinking how i'll be turning over the car in just a few minutes so i won't have to worry about something going wrong. when i came to a tight little curve. with a farm truck coming at me. the truck was in his lane. i was in my lane. the farmers trailer was also in my lane. with no lights on it so i really didn't see it until i was almost on top of the tire. the tire that was sticking out a foot from the trailer. the trailer that had no lights on it. i did manage to miss the damn trailer but i went straight to the bathroom when i got home. just to check. i did take the car home & i didn't mention that i almost wrecked it because of some stupid farm trailer. i also didn't mention that i almost shit my pants while driving the car. my mother-in-law is awesome.
later.

Games

my new car is still sick. the battery light keeps coming on. hubby cleaned the cables & took the battery to have it tested. it wasn't either of those possibilties. its a 12 & 1/2 volt battery & it measures 12 volts. we took the chance & took it the 140 miles round trip to pick up the kids anyway. i miss them too much to miss another weekend. to keep the kids awake on the way home hubby started the game of naming countries beginning with a & ending with z. when we got to letter c he offered the hint 'whats above the united states'? jammer replied 'CLOUDS'. yeah, he's the smartest. don't ya just love him?
later.

Possessions

how has it been 2 weeks since i last posted? how the hell have i missed so much of the last few months? i know. that evil damned facebook. i'm telling you once you start on that site its like a leach. theres no away from it. honestly its not the facebook itself. i only have like 90 friends so the wall isn't that busy. its the games associated with facebook. theres 'farmville' where you have a farm & have to plant seeds, wait for them to mature then harvest them. theres 11 different animals you have to do things to when they reach a certain maturity. everything does this anywhere from 4 hours to 4 days. you do have to check your wall to see if anyone has accomplished some ribbon or fertilized enough to offer a bonus. they share the wealth. then theres 'fishworld' that you have virtual tanks that you buy & sell fish. you decorate the tanks & visit your 'neighbors' to help maintain their tanks. you get bonus' for that too. not to mention 'mafia wars' where you fight other gang members & shake down rackets to earn money. 'yoville' where you live in an apartment that you dress to fit in & invite people to dance or box to make points. 'castle world', 'vampire wars', 'pirates', 'wizardry with harry potter', 'zoo' & jeez the list goes on & on. i didn't want to get involved with any of them but when some of my best friends begged me to join to at least gift to them. oh yeah, you can give gifts to all you neighbors. anyway, i couldn't say no to my friends. could i?
speaking of ocd...
my car has learned how to distract me too. that pretty dashboard. oh the lights. the pretty flashing lights. last night on my way home from work i stopped by the store. when i came out my car wouldn't start. after about an hour the jumper cables finally coaxed the car to a start & i jumped in & floored it towards home. about half way there, which is still 30 minutes from home, i flipped on my bright lights. see that pretty blue light that looks like a headlight? yeah, i know that light. its a calming blue but what is that yellowish orange light that says 'check engine'? i don't think thats good & theres a new bright red light i've never seen before. it kinda looks like a battery & i know that can't be good. about the time the yellowish orange light came on the teal colored mileage light came on that has only shown its retarded face about once a month since i got the car. i think its shy. now i'm beginning to think the car is possessed! maybe someone died in it & their spirit is still trying to hold onto its earthly existence. that could explain the shit going on with this car. but the facebook thing? its just a pain in the waazoo.
later.

Butterflies & Doornails

did i tell you i bought a new car? its a cute litte plymouth breeze. it has 17 inch tires that look like they're about an inch thick. i mean when you hit a pot hole you have about an inch of tire between the road & the rim. as you can see by the spoiler someone has souped it up. i haven't made up my mind whether i like it or not. i thought about painting butterflies across the scoop. hubby painted it blue for me to match the writing on the car. i have put a wheel cover on the steering wheel that has butterflies on it & i want to either paint or buy seat covers with butterflies. i have big plans for her. her that i have christened 'dottie mae' after my mommy. i may even paint the name across the back. i still have cherry but she upchucked on the radiator & i'm seriously considering selling her as is. you have to reach some point where you stop dumping money in a dead doornail. (what the hell is a dead doornail?) i have to load a new photo program before i can get anymore pics in here. this stupid vista. i used the program that came with it for editing pics but now that free trial has expired & i haven't gotten around to loading photoshop. so for now this is the only reasonable sized pic i have. i guess i could have washed her before i started pasting pics of her all over the internet, huh?

later.

Our Newest Projects

i've been painting on another mat. this one for my mother-in-law. its a group of her favorite flowers. i've finished the background & filled some spaces with leaves. oh shit, i'll just show ya what i've done so far. the next flower i'm gonna put on it is an iris in the bottom left corner. those few marks you see on the right are rose leaves & i'm planning on adding to them with a star gazer lily in the upper right corner. i'm thining maybe i'll fill the spots in with daisies. all the other flowers are her favs but the daisies are because i love them. oh, the top left you can't really tell what they are in the pic but those are oak leafed hydrangeas. you can see the 4 leaf flower spikes when you're actually looking at it. although, to make them more pronounced i'm gonna outline the edges in a really pale green. i've been putting it off cos i don't want to mess it up & i need to practise on the placement before i commit it to the mat. i'm thinking i need to extend the iris leaves a little too. run them up into the oak leaf. my sister, nipper, has been dropping little hints that she wants a mat too. i'm thinking of doing one of her home. it sits up on a hill & i think it'll look cool with her flowers painted behind it. its just something i'm kickin around, so far. i'm still painting on the tree on my bedroom wall. hubby says its gonna be a year before i get it finished. course, i've got the rest of my life to finish that one. oh, speaking of hubby, he's been talking about shaving his head for years now. is that just a guy thing or what? i've heard several men say they'd like to see themselves at least once bald. i guess to see if they have a weird head or what. so i'm sure you know what i'm gonna show you next.... yep, he did it for sure. we took the kids home & hubby talked sonny into shaving it for him. he's lucky cos its not an ugly head. its not all knicked up & for the most part its just smooth. where his hair was is all white so he needs some sun on it but other than that it looks pretty natural. after halloween he's gonna grow his hair back out so it'll only be for a few weeks. i think he's gonna let me paint brains spilling out for halloween. we were gonna dress with the kids as zombies but sonny decided to keep the kids for halloween & take them himself. i'm glad he's taking them. they need to spend more weekends with their kids. i know honey wants her time off but i'm gonna enjoy some time off myself. afterall, i'm the one that works all week.

last weekend we went to see my youngest b-i-l acting in sweeney todd. he played the judge & did an excellent job. my oldest b-i-l is also in a play this week. he's acting in one flew over the cuckoo's nest. i'd love to go see it but i think i'll love staying at home without the kids a lot better. so, i'm looking forward to this weekend. like i haven't looked forward to a weekend in a long time. i just hope the nice weather hangs in there.
well, gotta get ready for bed. another work day to prepare for.

later.

Booking Up My Time

is anyone here on facebook? i've avoided it like the plague. until a few months ago when a school pal contacted me after a birthday party he had. he said if i created an account i could see all the photos they took at the party. there were lots of my old school pals that came to his party & i had to see who all came. i finally gave in & created an account to check out the pics. i'll be honest. i'm not sure if i'm happy or just stressed with this facebook deal. yeah, i've reconnected with a lot of school friends & its been great. but i was also invited into some games. well, for the most part i did avoid the games until one of my friends invited me to join farmville. its been pretty cool. you plant things & lots of people give you gifts. some of them animals some of them decorations for your farm. you make money by helping other people clear their farms of foxes, crows, gophers & weeds. you also get extra points when you buy things for your farm. is anyone familiar with this game? i've created a pretty cool farm but lots of times when its time to harvest my plants or tend the animals i was kinda busy with something else so i let jammer take over the farm on the weekends. man, i have a mansion & elephants & a hot air balloon!
but the little shit joined me in a lot of other games & now i'm so stressed with all the crap i'm supposed to be doing i'm kinda sorry i ever got on facebook at all. you get invites to all the events going on around town cos everyone i know is either in a play or part of a halloween happening. not to mention birthday parties & school events. i mean, cripes! its everything. so, i sign into facebook & for an entire day its nothing but answering invites & accepting gifts, replying to people i know or haven't seen for years, harvesting plants, milking cows, picking fruits, helping neighbors, building houses, planting crops, tilling grounds....i swear, it never ends. and the best part? the best part is the little shit i let help me with my farm & accepted invites to so many other games isn't here all week so i'm stuck doing it all by myself! as slow as my computer is i'm waiting for up to an hour to go from one screen to another. its a vicious circle! i'm telling you one big vicious circle! i'm ready to buy him his own computer so he can keep up with everything all week long. anyone wanna sell me another computer? its open season on what i'd do to get this shit off my back!
well, now that i've ranted, to almost my hearts content. i guess i could just ignore these things but i hate letting people down. i mean, after all, its just a game.

the one good thing that came out of it all is i got to see a bunch of cool pics! school friends that have gotten old just like me. graying & fatter than they were. its fun to see who will friend me next. so, if i'm not around here & you have a facebook account you can find me at lewlew57@hotmail.com. come on over to the frantic side!

later.

Quick Catch Up

a comment on one of my last posts clued me into the fact that my comments had been turned off. (thanks tamie) sorry about that. i'm not sure how it happened. i've been reading up on how to change my background so maybe i did it when i was messing around with that.
not much new happening here. we've been taking some time away from the kids. at least at home they're out in the boonies & can't co-mingle with boys in the woods. i'm almost afraid to bring ix around & let her go out to play. i'm pretty sure sonny would kick my ass if she turned up pregnant by someone around here. i don't mean in the near future, of course, i mean in the not to far off future.
i'm hoping to learn what i need to get this background changed soon though. i'm reading up on it & learning html looks pretty easy. i'm not the luckiest person with this friggin vista operating system i'm on now. seems like everytime i go fooling around with things i mess something up. bare with me though. i'll get it.
later.

Put A Lock On Your Shit

remember we went to grandparents day for ix a few weeks ago? after we had lunch remember we took her through the book fair? she gathered several books & we made her pick the one she really wanted. we had just given her & jammer each $15 bucks a few weeks before that to go to the book fair. a few days after our visit she started aggravating mom & dad that she needed another $15 bucks. sonny told her she'd already had plenty of money for the book fair & refused to give her more money. weelll, she decided better! she decided to steal a journal from the bookstore & guess what? she got caught! only by the time she was caught she had already written in the book so she had to fess up. only not before the school called sonny & let him know what she had done. this weekend I finally saw the book & checked it out. while reading through what she wrote i came across a page of 'my biggest wish' listings. want to know what ixxie's biggest wish was? grab your ass & cover the kids eyes cos this is gonna throw you for a loop!
her biggest wish was 'to have sex'! oh yeah, the next few years will definitely be a stress on my nerves. now i know why every time she leaves the yard we find her in the woods with a boy. i really wanted to give her the benefit of the doubt & believe that she didn't have a clue why it was so bad for her to be playing by herself in the woods with a little boy. one page of a diary & my hopes for a clueless little girl is out the window. yeah, she knows what she's doing. yeah, she'll be pregnant before she's 15. anyone know where i can buy a chastity belt? its either that or sew her twat shut! at nine years old i thought boys were yucky. i didn't even think about a boy in that way until i was at least 15. and my parents thought i was boy crazy. shit, they had it easy. when we were talking about it with her, jammer walked in & heard the last of the conversation. you wanna know what his biggest wish was? his biggest wish is to get a real gun! lord, help us all! i'm scared! aren't you?
later.

Long, Cold, Work Night

our big black tie event is coming up again this weekend. long day. but its usually great food & maybe not good but at least entertaining music. this year its a congo theme. i've seen green & pink table umbrellas & glittery green leaves. the tent isn't as big as usual so the crowd is smaller. hopefully the auction will bring in lots of money & the computers will work this year. talk at ya later,

K-boos B-Day

hubby's only niece turned 2 last week & we were invited to bring the kids to her birthday party. baby bro & his wife just bought a house & k-boo was getting a brand new swing set/fort for her birthday. although it wasn't completely put together it was enough to keep the kids entertained for hours. and entertain it did. it kept the adults busy too. k-boo isn't interested in cake so she had a carved watermelon & ice cream. she had lots of gifts to keep her busy. i was surprised that she opened one gift at a time & wanted to indulge in each one individually. she sat on mommys lap & read books as she opened them. she pulled strings & pushed buttons. it was fun to watch. child definitely has patience! she wanted to pull her shirt off & try on new clothes right there in the back yard! she was amazed with all the new things. she had received a new toy stove & refrigerator set before we even got there. one guy showed up with his dog cos he didn't have kids. we started out with 2 balls. the big one you see ix on in that top pic & a smaller kick ball. can you see this coming? yeah, within just about a half hour, of the dog & balls, both were history. the dog was wore out & the balls were busted. ce la vive! needless to say, the kids found other things to do with the busted balls. typical, you buy them a swing set & they'd rather play with the box it came in. we had a great time & the kids were invited back for a stayover. talk about a glutine for punishment!
later.

Bad Mamaw

a grandparents day is set up by the kids school every year. i love to go to these things. it makes the kids feel so important. they introduce you to all their friends & teachers. they show you their work & make you a card or clay ashtray. something from their art class. you get to have lunch with them & sit with them in the auditorium for a nice chat. in other words they mostly get to show their ass for the day with no consequences.
honey mentioned on the phone that she had the invitations (made by the kids) & would bring them to us when they dropped the kids off on friday. she said the special day was on friday the 18th for both of them. these grandparents day are usually all on the same day. i think that is a protection for the teachers sanity so they only have to put up with the little heathens showing their asses one day out of the year. like thats gonna happen, right? something i wasn't made aware of: this year jammer & ixxie are in separate schools so the special day was different for each of them. jammers was actually on the day we received the invitation sealed in an envelope & he was disappointed in us. when he came in he said, 'memaw! pappaw! (with his bottom lip stuck how so far he could've tripped on it) how come you didn't come to my grandparents day? i walked into the auditorium looking for my grandparents & they weren't there! i was so disappointed'! i said 'no jammer, its next weekend'! honey handed me the invitations & sure enough jammers was that day. oh how my heart squeezed & broke right on the spot. i looked at honey & said, 'i'm pissed at you'! she did that little blink-blink thing & said, 'i really didn't know'. why? why if you dont know something do you say whatever you assume to be? why wouldn't you make sure of something before you open your unintelligent mouth? she called to let me know as soon as she got the notice but never bothered to open the damn thing to find out when it was. ix had told her she had grandparents day on the 18th & honey just took it for granted that meant both kids wthout even looking at the notices. i hugged jammer & apologized over & over. i promised him we'd do something to make it up to him. he said it was all right & patted my back making me feel that much smaller. such a big guy. i could just imagine his disbelief when he scanned that big room & truly came up with no grandparents there to participate in his big day.how his little heart must have plummeted when the realization sunk in that we really weren't there. special things like this really mean such a big thing to little guys like him. all week i thought about how disappointed my poor little jammer must have been. all week i kicked myself for not making honey open the papers to make sure. all week i just felt like such a shitty gramma. i couldn't get that picture out of my mind.
i took the day off this past friday so we could go to ixxie's school. we did lunch with her & met her friends, teachers & principal. we went to her book sale & bought her books & walked the halls of her school with her. she was in heaven. the whole time i kept thinking how jammer had missed out on all this. how here i was for my step granddaughter but i wasn't there for my own flesh & blood. don't take that wrong because i feel bad enough about thinking it. but honestly, it was tearing me up that i missed my baby boys day. i think we've done a great job making ix feel like a true part of our family. i don't believe she ever feels like she's not as loved as the rest of the kids. nobody ever says anything about her not being a true grandchild. even when we introduce the kids we never mention that she's not ours. people have told me how she looks like sonny & we never correct the assumption that she's his own child. when we met ix she was 3 years old & a very backward child. at family functions she'd crawl under a table & cry that she didn't want to be there. she didn't like being around strangers. (a stunt her mother always pulls to get out of doing things she doesn't want to do so the apple wasn't falling far from the tree) our families would all do whatever it took to make her feel comfortable. part of the gang. it took a few years but we finally pulled her out of whatever hole she had been living in. she doesn't even remember those days now. she doesn't remember that she hasn't always been a part of this loving circle of family. my sisters & brother & hubbys brothers are all her aunts & uncles. no one would have it any different. i guess i'll go to hell for it but deep down in my heart i was just dying that i was smiling at all ix's friends & teachers making her day just wonderful while jammer was sitting in his classroom with his special day behind him & the emptiness of no memories to take away from his day with his grandparents. bad memaw! bad, bad memaw! i couldn't live with myself. hubby saw the dilemma i was in. he knew how my heart was breaking that we let jammer down. he surprised even me by calling jammers school. he asked if we couldn't stop by to surprise him & bring homemade cookies. they were glad to work with us so after we finished with ix we joined jammer at lunch. when we walked into the cafateria he jumped up waving his arms like crazy & yelled, 'memaw! pappaw!' we met his friends & we met with his teacher after they were all finished, took him a book from ix's book sale, signed him out of school so he didn't have to ride the bus home & went back to collect ixxie. we made his special day even more special because it was such a surprise for us to show up.
oh, i almost forgot. when we got there his principal came out of the office to escort us to the cafateria. he shook our hands & told us 'jammer is a special little guy & a daily tickle for him'. he laughed as he told us he had a story for us. apparently, jammer had gotten busted throwing paper out of the school bus window. he was given a note to take home to mom & dad for a signature letting them know what he was in trouble for. seems that the note never was returned so the principal called mom & dad to find out why they didn't send the signed note back. the note they never received. mr. wright caught jammer in the hall that morning to ask him about the note. jammers explanation? the note was caught by a breeze coming through the bus & flew out the window! he chuckled & said, 'we get alot of stories, you know, the dog ate my homework kinda thing but he's an original. definately gives me a laugh on a regular basis'. he lowered his voice & said, 'i think he's my most favorite student ever'!
later.

Remembered

we must never forget.

blessings to all the families dealing with lost love ones. blessings to the lost loves & the brave souls that are still fighting that war. later.

End Of The Line

why is it through the week a half dozen things happen & i think, man this is definitely blog material! but the minute i sit down to start writing my brain just goes blank. i have to sit on it for awhile till it comes back to me.
oh snap! i remember. as i was walking to the mail room today i passed along the train route. we have a small train that takes you on a trip around the grounds. it takes about 15 or 20 minutes round trip. at the spot where it passed me was on its way over the lake. as employees we're asked to wave at the occupants as it passes us. its a thrill to the kids to wave at us. thats why i stopped on the bridge & was standing there letting it ride by me. i usually try to race it from one spot to the next cos we have these crossroad arms that drop & it seems like forever before they raise & you can cross the tracks again. so, i'm standing there waving when the end of the train comes from behind the trees & i'm thinking 'thank goodness, its gone'. but along behind the train comes 2 of the guys that had been hanging our christmas lights along the track. one is carrying an extention cord coiled around his arm. the other is lifting the end of the cord up off the tracks. turned out just before the train started over the lake the end of the extention cord bounced & wrapped around the tail of the train. the guys had jogged half way around the tracks trying to get it loose. and me without my camera. what are the chances of that? and christmas is still months away. i can't wait to see what happens next.
later.

One Fireworks Story

every year, for 30 some odd years, on the first sunday of september webn puts on a fireworks show to signify the end of the summer. its always the most awesome fireworks show. it tops anything else we have all year long. the 'rossi' family are well known for their fireworks worldwide & they swear they start on it immediately afterwards for the following year. they shoot the fireworks from barges parked in the middle of the ohio river & off bridges on either side of that barge & synchronize music to the whole show. not to mention the bands & entertainment tacked on. this year they said the fireworks were actually floating in the river instead of just being shot off the barge. when i was much younger & the fireworks first started we went every year. it became a tradition for all my friends to go as a group. the more the merrier. back in the day you could bring coolers, food, blankets, chairs, dope & the family dog & cops didn't bother you. unless you got too out of control but for the most part it was just one big, cool end of summer party. with crowds numbering in the half millions & all the restrictions i don't indulge so much these days. you're not allowed to bring all that stuff & cops confisgate anything they find now. the jails fill up quickly too as a result of the policing. i'm not knocking our cities finest i'm just saying. things aren't as lax as they used to be. the year my baby sister, lucky, turned 21 i asked if she wanted to go with us when i went by to drop sonny off for the night. my mom said, 'no, my baby isn't going down to that mess! we'll just watch it on tv'. (they always showed it on tv that night & again the following saturday.) we all gathered on the floodwall as we normally did. laying blankets out with coolers on each corner to keep them in place. spraying ourselves down with bug spray to keep the mosquitos away. tossing frisbees & footballs. passing the time & preparing to lay back & watch the fireworks. just a few minutes into the fireworks & someone came running through stepping right in the middle of my comfortable spot as i oohhed & ahhed at the beautiful display going on over my head. i sat up quickly but that person was already 4 layers higher into people. damn brats, why do people bring their kids & then turn them loose? when another brat came running across the blanket. i reached up & grabbed an arm as they swung past me. the kid stopped 'let go! i have to keep up with my' & closed his mouth as he looked down & realized he was yelling at his mother. how she managed it i don't know but lucky had convinced my mother to not only let her come to the fireworks but drag my 11 year old son with her! i sat his ass down beside me & waited for my sister to come back looking for him. finally, here she came backtracking down the hill yelling 'spud! spud where are you'? 'over here', i yelled back & waved my hand in the air. her mouth was hanging open when she recognized who had her nephew & the trouble she was about to be in. 'honest lin, i promised mom we'd stay at aunt cellies & be back in an hour. please don't be mad at us'. i don't know if its my luck or her unluck that the path they chose brought them straight up the middle of my blanket. what were the chances? i was, on the other hand, glad that if sonny was gonna be at the fireworks he would at least be with me! where i could protect him. silly kids. and no, i didn't tell my mother. lucky was indebted to me for life after that one.
later.

Out Of The Mouths Of Babes

who ever thought having grandkids every weekend was a good idea needs to be shot! oh yeah, that would be me. i started aggravating the very day jammer was born. stupid, stupid, stupid!
me: why have you been so mean & ugly since you got here?
jammer: memaw, i'm gonna be honest with you. my mommy fills me so full of sugar before i get here that i'm mean & ugly for days.
later.

Good Times Under The Crescent Moon

once upon a time there was a man named warbo. he was a very sweet guy, younger than me but ran with our older crowd. he was short, stocky & covered in fur. honest, from the top of his head all the way down to his flat feet. this man had more hair than anyone i've ever known in my life. he looked like he wore a thick angora body sweater. i once asked him where his neck ended & his body began cos i seriously couldn't tell. he shaved his neck that night so you could tell the difference. it didn't help much. then he just looked like an angora body sweater with a beige stripe. then he shaved his beard & wow, what a difference! he had one. a face that is. i guess in his line of work things like appearance & being deemed 'human' didn't matter much to him. at least until some girly girl pointed out to him she couldn't tell if he was man or monkey.
he was a truck driver by trade. i think he drove a truck so he could have access to the very best weed you could ever find. back then making friends in our group was alot easier if you had good weed.
although i did nothing to encourage him this guy swore he was in love with me. i never felt that way about him & i know i broke his heart but when its not there you can't do much about it. i did care about him as a friend & i kept introducing him to my girlfriends hoping one of them would take the weight off my shoulders & make him fall in love with them. it just wasn't in his stars. the one girlfriend i thought would really fit the bill was a cutiepie named janie. we called her 'janie no name' cos we couldn't pronounce her last name. they knew each other for about 3 weeks when he asked her out & she said she'd love to but she didn't have anything really nice to wear so not to take her to anyplace expensive. he took her shopping & bought her an entire outfit. right down to shoes & a purse. then put her on a plane & flew her to new orleans for mardi gras for the weekend. they dated for about 6 months before he let her up for air & started introducing her to his circle of friends. unfortunately that was the end of them. she wound up marrying his best friend. i failed miserably at my matchmaking for poor warbo.
after he & janie no name split i felt really guilty so i hung with him alot for awhile. one night about a dozen of us went to red lobster for dinner. warbo, me & even janie no name with her new boyfriend all had a great time making as much noise as we could while getting drunker & drunker after our meal. we finally got kicked out of red lobster so we decided to go downtown to continue our partying. we smoked so much dope that night, not to mention all the drinking, i could barely stand up let alone walk. finally we decided to head back to our own neck of the woods. we live about an hours drive out of the city so on the way home i got this ferocious need to pee. we were only about half way home & they decided we were going farther out to a late night bar that another friend owned so we could keep on partying. i couldn't hold it to make it any further so i demanded we pull down a lane leading to the river to let me go pee. janie agreed she could stand to go too & the guys finally gave in to our demands. warbo pulled into a long dark lane that wasn't traveled much & backed in to an area that lead to a field. we didn't have much room between us & the gate leading into the field so janie veered off to the left & i went directly behind the car. as drunk as i was i figured between the fence & the car i would be safer squatting if i had something to hold on to. there was a faint red glow all around me from the taillights. i faced the fence & squatted a bit to pull my panties down & clung to the gate.
i heard the giggling from inside the car & didn't think much about it. who knows what makes men giggle? i went ahead & started taking care of my business. considering i was feeling like an overfilled water balloon i peed & peed. it felt like it was taking forever to get done. i'm sure this all happened a lot faster than it felt like but we all know being drunk tends to make your senses all go into slow motion. all of a sudden the area lite up like a football field! during half time! needless to say i was blinded & slow in moving & all of a sudden my ass felt like it was on fire. what happened, you might ask? well, seems warbo & his buddy decided they'd give us more light since it was taking us so long. he had put the car in reverse while holding his foot on the brake pedal. explains the light, right? my ass feeling on fire? when he put the car in reverse it jumped back enough that the double mufflers were sitting on my right cheek. although it took a minute hot wasn't the word for it! thanks warbo, for the memories. i could never forget you. to this day, i still have 2 crescent moon shaped scars on the right side of my ass. just in case you were wondering.
later.

What Makes Kids Tick

we babysat k-bug a few weeks back for baby brother-in-law. he & his wife were in a play. they try not to do that too often but in this case the play needed one more person & asked marco to fill in. he felt obligated cos wifey was in it & he's a supportive kinda fella. the play was called 'joseph & the amazing technicolor dream coat'. hubby & i have gotten to the point that we don't attend many plays anymore. i mean these people are really into their plays & its one after another. while marco was appearing in one he was in rehearsals for 'sweeney todd'. like i said, one after another. they're great but i have to skip seeing the grandkids when i attend so i opt mostly for the grandkids. we did attend the first time marco appeared in a smaller part in 'sweeney todd'. this time he has a main character part & i would really like to see it but i'm not sure yet. yeah, i'm talking through my hat: we'll go & see him. this is too big a part. he plays the judge this time & i'm actually excited.
anyway, to entertain k-bug we took her swimming with the kids. the kids are great with her & she adores them. she was fine playing in puddles but the result of putting her in the pool kinda went like this.
we were told she'd been in pools before & loved them. i didn't get that from her reaction. i'm thinking maybe it was cos previously mommy was in with her & not planning on turning her over to uncle steiner. after mommy snuck off we headed on home. the rest of the night went ok. at some point i think the stress of being away from mommy & daddy for the week started getting to her. she'd be playing & out of the blue just walk off & start whining. when asked what was wrong she'd perk up & come back to play but i felt sorry for the baby. she's usually pretty happy & i couldn't help but pick her up & love on her every now & then.
she loves to rock.
in other news lil miss ix has decided she's too big to mind us anymore. twice today alone she's refused to answer us when called for dinner. when we asked if she heard us she said, 'i wasn't sure i heard you'. needless to say, she's being punished. oh yeah, big time! no tv for the rest of the weekend. she's dying! this kid lives for her tv & would rather sit inside watching tv then anything else you could suggest she does. course, this is the kid that says reading is a punishment. can you say mixed up? i'm at my ropes end trying to figure her out. but she will mind me. i won't give on that. we actually just got a notice in the mail that a child molester has moved into the neighborhood. this guy has been in jail before for the same thing & was released only to abuse another child. now he lives right around the corner from us. he won't have to worry about going back to jail if he does something to one of mine. i'll take care of his feed & board for the rest of his life. in a hole in my backyard. won't be any other kids that'll have to worry about him. i'm sure he won't live here long. my neighbors are pretty redneck. they won't put up with a child molester but in the mean time i'm watching mine really close.

later.

Dog Days Of Summer

are we missing some people? did my home planet send a ship i didn't know about & collect all the blogging people?

no, that can't be it. someone would've emailed me. or e-ted me or something. must be summer. yeah, thats it. i know its summer cos stupid me & hubby took the kids to a fair. a whole lot of rides, freaky people with colorful hats & peircing everywhere, cotton candy, hot dogs, funnel cakes, drunks, games, people yelling at us as we passed that we couldn't knock over the milk jugs, balloons, live music, screaming kids & walking. great time. 5 hours & a whole lot of money later we got to watch some huge fireworks that everybody ewwwed & awwwwed at we got to go home & fall into the bed. honestly if i had to walk that venue one more time i was gonna die. my feet felt like i was standing on 2 inches of dead meat. it was alot of fun & i wish i had proof but i also forgot to take the camera.
i did get pics of the stitches in jammers head, well they were actually staples. they stapled hair & all. i've never seen them not clean a wound before they did the closing. i thought they'd even shave the immediate area but nope, just stapled the shit closed & sent him home. daddy took the staples out a week later. it looks fine & jammer didn't even budge when it was done. sonny said he didn't even think he noticed when he pulled them out. like teeth, sonny & honey are saving the staples. why do people do that? i actually thought saving the teeth was a stupid idea. how could you convince a kid that the tooth fairy came & left them money if you had the tooth in a flipping jar? not the same fairy i knew when i was growing up. that bitch threw my precious little teeth away as soon as they came out of my head. which was fine with me. think of all the germs on those things. then what? you gonna take them out for years to come & talk about them? remind me of the pain i went through when that sucker came out? oh look, honey, remember this was when you & sissy was wrestling & she kicked that big tooth right out of your head. oh snap! i almost forgot to mention that jammers front tooth is coming in. remember the one sissy yanked out when she dropped him into the coffee table at 2 years old? it looks like he's gonna have a big ole gap between his 2 front teeth. unless the rest push them together alot over the next few years. i'll have to get pics of that for you next weekend.
time for bed. i still need to hit the shower & figure out what to wear tomorrow. i hate that job. not like i don't have a shitload of clothes to choose from but you never know how accurate the weather people will be. do i dress for rain or the first 100 degree day of the year?

later.

Welcoming An Angel Home

its been an extremely sad week in our world. a very dear man who will be sorely missed passed away on tuesday. my father-in-law lost his battle with cancer.
hubby has been reminiscing about the old days. he says he knows it was mum that sent him but it was always dad that busted him. he never got away with anything that dad didn't know about. i'm glad he finally has opened up because he's been quiet all week holding it all in.
lots of memories have been shared. lots of tears. lots of laughs. he was a loving father & a great husband. mum will be lost without him. we're all worried about her. dad always took care of the bills & the repairs. mum is strong, healthy & i'm sure she'll pull through this but we'll all be there for her.
last year dad had insisted on putting out a huge vegetable garden & this year its gone to crap. his flower garden is still going strong. its well established & it'll flourish without him for years to come but we all know where all the hard work came from to make it as beautiful as it is. hubby will go over & move things around. i know cos its what dad would have asked him to do. had him to help with if he was still able to.
i'm glad he had a chance to be a grandfather. i actually have video of him getting down on the floor to play with his granddaughter. even though it was hard for him to do he couldn't resist. she was the apple of his eye. even with ix & jammer, who wasn't his blood, he was loving. always teaching them things. holding them on his lap & talking with them.
so many memories. we're so thankful for the time we had him on this earth. thank you lord, for sharing your angel.
goodby dad, until we meet again.

Stretching The Limits

i finished moms mat & made a small plaque kinda thing to match. i thought maybe she could hang it over her door. i kicked around different things to print on the plaque like 'love grows here' or 'moms place' but i decided on these letters because at the end of all our emails we all use the letters of 'love you more than you know' or 'love you more & more everyday' or something to that effect. you can't really see the words & i wasn't gonna use the words themselves until nipper pointed out that nobody would know what it meant & it made more sense to just finish the words in smaller letters. she actually did an email up in word & sent it to me for the full effect. i think it matches pretty well & it all came out pretty good. what do you think? what you can't see is i also put a buttefly in the upper right corner of the plaque. if you click on the pic you can blow it up.
yesterday was my dads birthday & i'm working on a mat for him. he lives on what we've always called 'sunset ridge' where you walk out his backdoor & you look out over hills & hills rolling all the way to the river. its a beautiful scene & i'm trying to capture that for him. he's also big time into horses. he owns 5 right now. one is a big beautiful black stallion named 'levi' that i plan on putting right in the center of the yard. i took panoramic pictures of his place the last time i was out there. this is gonna be tougher than the mat i painted for mom. this is the center of the panoramic pictures i took. after i printed all the pictures & layed it out on my mat they fit almost perfectly to the size of the mat. all i really have to do is basically paint it pic by pic. i'm hoping to get this done by this weekend to give to dad before he leaves for the blackhills of montana on sunday. he's doing a 3 week vacation from the blackhills to bighorn on horseback. thats the hills that butch cassidy & sundance rode. terrorized, i mean. i'll post the finished work to let you compare. that is if i'm not too ashamed of it. no, i'll post it even if its not right. dads the one i want to impress. i just like showing you guys the ass i can make of myself. he's the one that'll be looking from my mat to his horizon saying what the hell was she thinking?
later

Back To School

so, i'm taking a vacation week. i start on monday. oops, thats today seeing its after midnight. as usual, my vacation starts out like shit. i took my car to my mechanic to have him check out the transmission he put in on my vacation last year. its been acting funny. so what did he do? he beat the shit out of my car in about 10 minutes & blew the head gasket. of course, he's not taking responsiblity for it so now i'm out of a car for vacation. believe me when i say my mechanic is out one client. asshole. not only did i miss the 'cash for clunkers' deal but i've spent all my income tax money. shitty timing for me.
on a good note, i went to the doctor last week & my cholesterol is down, my blood pressure is good & my sugar is great! i'm gonna start my diet again. just for good measure. i wanna lose another 30 pounds & then i'll be done.
today was hubbys birthday. we took him shopping but he bought for his brother instead of himself. i tried to get him to buy some new clothes or something but he said he didn't need anything. so, i just baked him a cake & we all sang happy birthday. at least he ate the cake.
sometime this week i'm gonna attempt to change my template here. if i screw it up it may be a while before i'm back. wish me luck on that. i've read the backup info here in blogspot & i'm hoping if i screw it up i can at least return to the original. guess you'll be the first to know.
jammer starts back to school on thursday. he had to be rushed to the hospital last friday. his mother, for lack of a better term, managed to drop a bed rail on his head while he was playing his playstation. he wound up getting a few stitches. honestly, between his mom & his sister the poor kid doesn't have a chance. i'm thinking i need to invest in a bubble. i have to find some way to keep him safe. may be i should ship in off to a boarding school. i could go as a teacher so i could be with him. man, guess i better go brush up on my aerodynamics cos he's gonna need some help with that bubble thing.
later

All The Days Long

man, where does the time go? i need a more exciting life to keep up with all you.

in the last 3 weeks, jammer graduated from kindergarten with a 97 out of 99 on his psat finals. i'm so tickled with him. he was awarded 7 certificates for being best in class & has a shitpile of words to learn for the first grade.

we've been swimming alot. i've also been painting. wanna see my last project? course, i'm gonna show it to you anyway. its a mat i painted on the back of a piece of linoleum for my mom. remember, i told you she divorced her current squeeze & went back to her maiden name? well, this is in celebration of that. i never looked at it really close when i was painting it. now that i look its kinda lopsided. isn't it? oh well, i'm not perfect. that just gives it more character. guess i'll use a measuring stick the next time i paint something so i get it more centered. this was all freehand. not bad for me. and the damn thing is 4 x 3 so it wasn't easy to eye. it looks better when you're looking down on it.
btw, anybody on facebook? thats something else i've been up to. i spent today adding friends. i've also been trying to talk my sis, nipper, into opening an account. she says her 19 yr. old won't let her open an account cos he doesn't want her to see what his little girlie friends are saying to him. i think i wanna spy on him. is that a bad aunt?
our county fair is going on this week & i wanna go this weekend. i start my vacation this friday. raaayyyy! i'm excited. i start my vacation with a dr.s appt. i get to meet my new dr. she's gonna wanna give me a blood test, among other things. if my cholesterol & blood pressure isn't good i'm gonna quit taking all these friggin pills. i hate pills.
we kept the kids an extra day this week. sonny had a axle on his truck go out so rather than having to take them home hubby kept them on monday. sonny works with a guy that lives right here by us & they ride together so i had him pick the kids up on his way home. jammer wasn't a happy camper by the time i got home. seems papaw pissed him off first thing by writing me a note that jammer didn't want to help in the garden. jammer ripped the note up but he pulled it out of the garbage to show me the 'mean letter papaw wrote'. the day just went completely downhill for jammer from there. he couldn't catch a high pitch when they tossed ball & they didn't get to swim long enough for him. needless to say he had a headache & wanted an ice pack for his head when i came in. a little lovin & he was fine. before he left he actually stretched his lips about a mile to kiss papaw by. he's a sweetie even when he's pissed.
time to go hit the shower. gotta a few days to get through. oh, my transmission i paid $800.00 for about a year ago is getting ready to go out. it shifts down on hills & won't shift back up. looks like this vacation is gonna be another stay at home to fix the damn thing. is it ever gonna get better?

later.

Stressed: Facebook Explodes My Twitter And Closes My Community

or something like that. who all has a facebook page? who has a myspace page? what about twitter? do y'all have trouble finding time to get on all those pages? or is it just me?

i can sign into facebook & theres so much posted that it takes all night to catch up with all those people & their lives. i mean those friggin walls are full! i just don't have the time to sign in every day & answer whatever posts have been directed at me. i'm lucky to sign into this blog once a week. some nights when i get home i just barely have time to get to everything i have to do by bedtime. even then on my way to bed i can find another half dozen things to do & by the time i actually make it to bed its an hour later. all the way through the house i'm thinking 'if i don't get to bed now i'm gonna feel like hell in the morning'. sure enough, every morning when that alarm goes off i think, holy shit, it can't be morning already. in most cases, just like tonight, its after midnight before i find time to get online & post. i'm not gonna lie: i love my sleep but i think thats because i never get enough of it!
weekends should be easy to get it all together. right? right?? not in my world. having the grandkids makes it almost more hectic than the normal week. jammer always has to go shopping cos he lost a jango or a bubba fett. or he saw something on tv that he just has to have but they don't have it at his store so we have to go to ours. or ixxie needs a fish for her aquarium but they don't have fish where they shop. they make my life a matter of life or death if they can't go somewhere. which means we spend a big portion of our days out of the house. so again, no rest for the wicked! as well as getting nothing done. i have to take a day off work to get caught up & then its only caught up for a day!!
so my point? let me show you how my body decided to rebel in its infinite wisdom:

later.

Shake, Rattle & Roll

sonny called me friday morning. i knew something was up. his voice sounded shaky when he said 'mom'? he had that little boy needs his mommy voice. sonny never did use that voice much. i think being without a daddy he had to always be the big guy but over the years when he did use it i learned to recognize that something was seriously wrong. i also learned to approach it carefully or he'd just clam up & deal with whatever it was. he never wanted to be babied. only a few times did he just lay his head on my lap & cry like the baby he was. even when he was a baby. poor kid always tried to be the tough guy that everybody thought he was. when i heard that 'mom' my heart did a flip flop. he took a breath & said, 'i think i'm hurt. the truck just rolled over me. i feel ok but maybe you could come'. all my years of training from him went out the window & i naturally got loud & screamed 'oh my god, how, what happened'? he said he'd been working on the reverse whatever in the truck & guessed he knocked it into gear. it rolled down off the ramps & over his upper chest, caught a little of his ear & pushed him across the gravel. he said he grabbed the tire & literally stopped the truck from rolling but knew he had to get out from under it so he started wiggling himself free. i didn't need to hear anymore. i was off the phone & heading to my boy! i couldn't make that hour & a half drive fast enough. my mind went into several different directions at the same time. you hear about all kinds of minor little accidents that end in death & this was a fucking 3000 pound truck! i couldn't believe he didn't go straight to the hospital but his pappaw standing there telling him to tough it out was running through my head. i could just imagine him telling him how he would be fine & just shake it off. sure enough i pulled into his driveway & pappaw & a neighbor standing there watching someone under the fucking tractor with a welding torch! i said to honey as i got out of the car 'who's under there welding'? and i knew before she answered who it was. i walked up to the tractor & said, 'spud get out from under there! haven't you had enough for one day'? pappaw said, 'he'll be done in a sec. just a quick fix'. i said 'NOW! OUT'! and looked at pappaw & said 'i can't believe you'! sonny came out & looked at me like he wanted to lay his head on my lap & cry. god, he looked like hell rolled over him with a tank! he was bruised all across his chest, neck, ear & back. i took him in the house & closed the door on pappaw. that old man is gonna pay someday for his self centered, uncaring, unfeeling fucking attitude! he killed my mom & i'll never forgive him for that plus this was the second time he fucked around & let my boy get run over! those are both a whole other post. right now i was freaking out & i was pissed! i could have knocked that bastards lights out & he needed to get out of my sight right now! so anyway, i looked sonny over & checked out his pupils, made him breathe for me & lift everything. he was moving slow but he swore to me that he wasn't feeling any pressure on his chest or in his back. he explained how far it went down & it wasn't near his heart. he wasn't having trouble breathing & he was talking clearly & wasn't adle minded. i tried my best to get him to go to the hospital. he was adamant about not going though. we picked the gravel out of his back & i made him take a hot shower & we put some cream on him for sore muscles. he took a pain killer & said he was gonna just sit down & take it easy. then he told me pappaw wanted him to go out & swing a sledge hammer for something. about that time he walked in the door & i put my foot down! i was livid! i wanted to put it down on his face but i maintained. i told pappaw, as calmly as i could, he was gonna go out to his trailer & leave sonny alone. he needed to rest & make sure he wasn't hurt internally. if he couldn't cooperate with me i'd just take him to the hospital for the weekend & he would get the rest he needed there. pappaw turned red in the face but he did go away. sonny said 'thanks mom' and laid his head on my shoulder & just stood there. i hugged him as gently as i could & whispered to him to please go to the hospital if he started feeling weird or had any trouble breathing, felt any kind of pressure or light headedness. i wish he'd let me take him but if anything changed to please go right away. he promised me he would & just stood there. letting me hug him & thanking god that he was alive again.
i prayed hard this weekend, had several conversations with god & thanked him over & over.
sonny is healing ok. he was actually able to laugh about it by sunday but i bet it'll be a while before he's brave enough to get back under a car. if nothing else i know it weakened my heart & i can only imagine what it did to his. that was a helluva scare.
later.

3 Weeks Of Everything

exciting things have been happening around here. you're gonna flip when i tell you everything thats happened in the last 3 weeks. thats if i can remember all the important things while i'm posting this. for starters: yaayyy! we got our big screen tv. that was a fiasco all by itself. we bought it but it wouldn't fit in the car. so, we had to find a way to get it home. once we got it home, we had bought a stand that had to be assembled (ummm, i say we but hubby would correct me & say 'we? what woman you gotta mouse in your pocket cos you didn't help me at all!) before we could set up the tv. finally at 10:30 pm the stand was together & we (and i helped!) got the tv out of the box, plugged in & turned it on only to find it was smashed across the screen. luckily our wal-mart is opened 24 hours a day so we took it back (again, i helped) & replaced it. finally, we got it home, plugged in & working great. we went with a sanyo 42' lcd hdtv that we just love! we're ready to rewatch all our 300 movies just because they have to look so much better with this huge, beautiful color tv screen we have now. i'm excited, especially, to see things like 'What Dreams May Come & 'i've been researching computers cos thats the next thing i want. if you have any suggestions for things to watch for or add ons to include, please let me know before we buy, i'd appreciate it. i have a pretty good idea what to look for but advise is always a good idea. i have 2 ide hard drives from this computer that i'd like to be able to use so i know i need at least 2 ide connections inside, plus i have a printer that i want to use & a scanner so i'm hoping to find at least something that will make that all possible. those are just some of the things i know to take into consideration but if you have any other ideas they would be helpful while shopping.
ix had her 9th birthday. a party was necessary. and shopping! lots of shopping!
something else we were looking for was a set of new bunk beds to get the kids in one room together. i hated the look of every bunk bed i looked at until i saw this:

the cutest idea i saw for a way to put both kids in one room. ix gets the top cos jammer has a tendency to roll out of bed. at 5 1/2 feet off the floor i couldn't take the chance of him rolling out & knocking himself silly so it was a no brainer. he wasn't real happy with the decision until he discovered the bottom opened up into a full size bed. that made him happy cos it gives him more room to spread his men out when he's setting up his 'quarters' for his star wars guys, along with his gi joes & cobras. everyone has a different corner & never have to encounter each other unless he so deems. don't you think thats an awesome bunk bed? i just love it. ixxie is beside herself. she got to sleep in the top last night & said it was the best nights sleep she's ever had. imagine that!! a brand new bed makes her old mattress heaven. we didn't have to replace the mattress cos her old twin mattress fit just right. but hey, as long as she's happy, i'm happy.
i've been painting different things around the house. did i show you my closet doors? i'll add them here just in case. i've been watching the 'one stroke painting' shows for years. i've always loved them so i finally decided to start using the knowledge i had accumulated. i love the one stroke painting technique. i've seen so many flowers & roses that i can do them in my sleep. so, i finally decided to start applying what i've learned & this was my first attempt. while i painted the front i let the kids paint their version of flowers on the back & they turned out so cute that i wished i'd let them paint something on the front. i think we're gonna do rocks instead. that way their art can be seen too. also, i always have my own private paintings on the inside of my doors. the great thing about the doors is i can take them with me wherever go. i got a pamphlet from my library & one of the pics on that was a frog. well, one of the pics i want to do is a scene on my bathtub that includes a frog. i decided to use the frog on the pamphlet as my model & it looks so cute. so far i've painted the mushroom he sits on. i've practised the frog on paper but i haven't applied it to a permanent spot yet. here is my mushroom with a pic of the frog: no my mushroom isn't exact but thats the beauty of painting. your perspective is what ever you see. after a few more shows i've actually caught on to a better way to make grass & i'll be improving on my practise shrums soon. when i'm finished practising i'll let y'all see it.
and for a grand finale'. my owls that i just finished painting. they were just plain ole black tin owls & i embellished on them. what do you think? i wished i'd taken a pic before i painted them.
anyway, thats been my preoccupation for the last three weeks. oh, and my tree in my bedroom. i started by scruffying the background & then i started painting my tree & leaves. i want it to look like its blowing in the wind. after that i'm gonna do just little vines with leaves around the walls here & there. it'll look so cute when i'm done.

so, any comments? later.

The Office

if you've been wondering, this is whats up in my world. we've been building on this for about a year now. honestly, i wasn't sure it would ever be done. they started talking about all this 6 years ago but had to acquire the funds first. once the powers that be got the notion they wanted to reopen the old entrance it was on. we've made a lot of budget cuts & talked up alot of sponsers but viola': there it is. and the best part about all of it?
MY NEW OFFICE : right there... where the arrow points. thats my window. that turret on the left is over my shoulder & supplies so much light that the auto lights in my office kicks off cos it can't see me moving. there's a small table for conferences right there & i have the printer over my left shoulder. its all so convenient & wonderful & beautiful & new!!! the turret on the right is a huge kitchenette/conference room & all the space in between is storage. we have our own bathroom that i don't have to work my way through members to get to so they won't ever know again when i have to 'go'. its air conditioned & it works! unlike the heating/air conditioning in the old office that you could never get right. i just love it. i feel like a queen. and for my new office i'm getting a new do. remember i started buying new clothes last week? ahhhhh, i'm living the good life.

later.

What A Small World

i got a wild hair & called nipper this week. usually we just email but i wanted to hear her voice. i miss my sissy & she's a great person. i think its something to do with being at the hospital. it makes me want to reach out & touch my family. she's been as busy as a one armed paper hanger since her company cut back on staff. don't you hate that they can add 7 jobs to your job description when they do their money saving cutbacks? she was telling me she went to an
appalacian festival on sunday. while perusing the crafts she noticed a booth that spouted owsley county quilts & recipes. my dad is from owsley county so she stopped in & was looking through the crafts offered by the little old lady that ran the booth. finally the lady walked up to her & asked if she could help her. nipper was reading her recipe book & i think she thought nipper was memorizing them. she is pretty frugal like that. nipper told her no she was just reading
her book because her dad was from owsley county. the woman perked her little ears & asked nipper who her daddy was. afterall, we're talking about a population of less than 5000 & this old lady was older than dust. so nipper told her she didn't know for sure who her daddy was but he was supposed to be pt from owsley county. (nipper didn't really say that but we got a big laugh out of the thought) well, lo & behold the old lady did know daddy. as a matter of fact she turned out to be his 2nd cousin twice removed. how does that happen? like i said, its a little county & i swear i think everyone is related to each other one way or another. turns out lucy mays, the little old lady, has heard of us. apparently, she is still in touch with my aunt, daddys sister, who talks about pt's 'girls' all the time. my aunt does love us. nipper & i are the only two that visits her regularly. she's the greatest aunt in the world. you can't leave her house without an armload of goodies. last time hubby & i were there she tried to give us boxes of canned food. back to lucy mays, she does her crafts while chatting with the women folk of the county & advised nipper that its time for us to visit with our aunt again. she misses us & her health is failing. a few years back she was diagnosed with diabetes & has to take insulin. we did know that & we got one up on ol lucy mays cos she didn't know my uncle is also diabetic. after lucy mays filled nipper in on her family she hugged her newfound cousin goodby as she removed the recipe book from her hands. it really is such a small world after all.
later.

Belated Mothers Day

i forgot to post for mothers day. damn, i'm a bad blogger. how do you forget to post for something as important as mothers day? and i'm a mother! mother fucking poor excuse of a mother if you ask me. not that i forgot my mom on mothers day or my mother in law for that matter. but i forgot all of Y-O-U. so, happy belated mothers day from one sorry piece of shit for an excuse of a friend. i hope you all had a wonderful mothers day, received fabulous gifts & fountains of lovings from all of your children. i hope god granted you sunshine & rainbows & your husbands flourished you with love & praise for all your worth. and that goes for dads that are mothers too. only i hope women on you, literally.
later.

Life Is Truly Precious

we had gone shopping over the weekend. we needed oil & antifreeze for the car so we wound up at walmart. while we were there hubby mentioned that i needed some summer clothes so i might as well shop to see if i could find anything i wanted while we were there. i know! i couldn't believe it either but i definitely jumped on the offer. that he was in the mood to wait around & actually let me shop made me suspicious but damn, i went for it all the same. i found 3 pairs of slacks that i liked & one top. when i got home i tried them on again & we (he was the one that convinced me) decided they were really too big & i needed to get a smaller size. (yeah for me) on monday we decided to exchange them so as soon as i got in from work off we went.
the phone was ringing when we walked back in. hubby's dad had fallen & nobody could get him up (mum is a little tiny woman & baby bro, the painter, isn't much bigger) remember dad has been diagnosed with cancer & is in the advanced stages of the disease. so we waited on him until he was ready & as soon as he was up to it hubby & i raised him to his walker. he made it to his chair to sit for awhile but he wasn't feeling right. mum talked him into agreeing that he needed to go to the hospital so we carefully walked him to the car. mum called right after they arrived & reported that dad had suffered a mild heart attack sometime that day & a full blown seizure as soon as they arrived at the hospital. he was stabilized but they were keeping him for the night. little did we know that this was the beginning of a nightmare. tuesday night dad suffered another heart attack. this one was much more damaging & he's now left with only 15% of his heart functioning. he actually died. his heart had stopped beating & he wasn't breathing. it took them a half hour to bring him back & his ekg wasn't show much brain activity. they didn't have much hope. they had him pretty doped up & by morning he was holding his own. his brain activity was picking up & he seemed to be fighting with all his might. he woke up finally on thursday with hubby there by his side. he tried to communicate as best he could. what hubby got from it was dad wanted him to yank him off all the connections to go smoke a cigarette. nothng like pounding a few more nails in your coffin. he's been so doped up that he mostly slept through the next few days. friday night the hospital staff called & his heart rate was up somewhere near 19o beats per minute. it should be around 80. they had the crash cart in his room waiting for something to happen. it finally settled down on its own but they've kept the cart in his room just in case. finally sunday mum called & dad was awake & for the first time was asking where he was & why. he didn't have any recollection of the last week. today they are talking about letting him go home in the next few weeks. he's off the ventilation machine but his heart is still too weak for much. i don't think we'll have him for much longer on this earth.
later.

Offerings

hey all, i'm a bad blogger. how many times have i told you that? but i am so sorry i haven't been around. i think i've missed some important events & maybe hurt some feelings. its not cos i don't love ya'all. its truly money burning a hole in my pocket. this old pc of mine is so slow. it just takes forever for some blogs to load & god forbid i want to watch an utube video. i have to wait forever & let it run through once or all i get is bits & pieces. i want a new computer so bad i can taste it. i've been shopping for one that is worth my money. i'm not rich so when i got hold of an extra $500.00 all i could think was this is my chance. i have to watch sales & pick the right one cos its gonna have to last the rest of my life. pretty soon i'm hoping to find the perfect pc just for me. something else i'm gonna have to do is go for faster internet connection. one of the things i have done in the last week is visit my library. i want to know about networking & setting that up. its something i'm completely stupid about. you know, my library doesn't have a networking for dummies book. i did get a few networking books but those are so easy to learn from. i was disappointed. i've also been trying to do some redecorating in the house. which hasn't been easy with working every day & having the kids on the weekends. i just don't have enough time to get everything i want done in a day. we finally did get everything back in the bedroom & the curtains made & up. i had to wait for a paycheck to get the ceiling paint which we finally got last weekend. i have to rely on hubby to do that cos i (a. can't reach (b. can't paint (c. have to work.
so, i promise i'll be back with a vengeance once i get all this shit together. just be patient with me. in the meantime, i've found a few things i think might make up for both my lack of posting & visiting. this is one i think some of ya'll will love & this is one i just love . check them out & let me know what you think.
later.

Greetings

'Happy Easter' everyone! even without the kids we still did the ham & potatoes along with the boiled eggs. i just didn't color them. but it was a good lazy day & ms. m is tickled pink with her bone.
hope ya'all had a great day, too.

later.

Paying The Piper

even though there's soon to be a lawsuit regarding the twins i emailed mojo to request she meet with me to give the twin xmas gifts that they still have to get. isn't it awful that she won't let us even give them the gifts we bought for them? of course, (and i didn't expect anything different) she never responded. BEYOTCH!! but soon, i just need to be patient. not my best quality i assure you. but i'm doing my best 'hang in there' impersonation. i miss my girls so much. the only way i get to see them is by visiting her 'my space' page. she posts new pics occasionally & i get to see their smiling faces there. i guess if she knew i had her page saved she'd probably quit posting there. and just to reiterate again: BEYOTCH! i can only hope someday someone takes a loved one away from her & refuses to even acknowledge her existence in their life. paybacks are a mother fucker & i hope she gets hers. of course, pretty soon sonny will be socking it to her so i guess i shouldn't feel this way. but not getting to see my granddaughters is really taking its toll on me.
the devils gonna take me to hell for the way i feel about her.
its easter weekend. i called about the kids today & honey informed me that her dad was having an easter party & they were taking the kids to him this weekend. that really ticks me off too. i can't tell you how many times i've been told how honey hates her father. he's never been there for her & he hates my son. i just don't get it. the less you do for them the more they love you? the thing that really pisses me off about this is they didn't bother letting us know ahead of time. i had to call them today to find out they weren't coming. after we bought easter goodies, i might add. someone just needs to smack me.
later.

Staying Busy

i told you that damn groundhog didn't know what he was talking about. he saw his shadow & predicted 6 more weeks of bad weather. well, here it is 2 months later & we've got snow!! its not accumulating but its been spitting snow all damn day. in case i haven't said it enough, i hate snow!!
i've found a new hobby. for the last year or so as we've flipped through the channels on saturdays i've stopped on the painting shows to watch a little. before i knew it i was looking for them intentionally. there's a woman named donna dewberry that does a show on pbs. i just love her. she does all kinds of projects but her one stroke painting is fabulous. i'm thinking of adding some charm to the freshly painted bedroom. maybe a tree & some flowers would be pretty. bring the outside garden in. i'm thinking of copying parts of my own garden. course, this may be too big of a project & i might wimp out but for right now, its on my agenda.
two big purchases are also on my agenda. i want a new flat screen hdtv. a BIG one. and i want a new computer. if you're wondering where i've been lately, i've been shopping. you know me, i can shop all day long. what you may not know is i'm a tight ass. i really hate to part with my money so to do that i have to find a really good deal. if you hear of any, let me know...
later.

Mastering The Fine Tuning

finally, i've just about finished with the bedroom. except for the curtains & deciding where everything will look best on the shelves. you know, the fine tuning. i really don't want to put it all up till hubby paints the ceiling. have you ever tried to get paint dots off of ceramics? that shit ain't easy. once i used this stuff called 'awesome' & it totally is just that because it really cleans your shit without scrubbing but it takes the color off with it. the only thing i know that works is good ole soapy water & that needs to be done as soon as possible. i'm so glad to have the floor fixed. that tilt a floor i had to walk through to go to the potty in the middle of the night was getting old. the pale tangerine color really brightened the room though. i should have done this years ago. even walking the tilt a whirl would have been easier if i could have seen like i do now. but, right now, its my favorite room in the whole house. up to this point my ivy covered kitchen was my fav. its moved down to the 2nd fav. i searched high & low for the perfect pieces for the kitchen till i had it all, then decorated it. i think its cute as hell. martha stewart ain't got nothin on me!!! i joke that i'm a 'jack of all trades: master of most'. how many women do you know that can cook the bacon, sew a pair of curtains & pull your motor out of the car all rolled into one? oh, and repair your computer to boot? ha! i'm too much. ow, i think i just pulled a muscle patting me on the back. i'm not as bendy as i used to be. and sad to say, i'm getting old.
later.

Pride In Success

i told you jammer has been learning to read. he's doing so well. every report he brings home is marked with exceptional on it. his teacher says he's doing work above his grade. report cards are being sent home next week & he's in the 'fab four' club for his distinguished work. doesn't that just tickle you? he's so proud & puffed that i think he's gonna bust sometimes. he called his great grandpa to let him know how well he's doing. he thanked him for the birthday card with the $6.00 he sent him. he explained how hard he was trying to learn to read & telling him how to spell some of the harder words he knows. he held his own in the conversation. the last thing i heard him say was 'i love you very much'. my dad told him how much he loved him back. i think he's bucking for more money out of this deal.

Leaving The Dark Side

we celebrated lucky's best friend passing her exam for broker's license today. She's been so stressed over homework for the last 5 weeks that even talking to her on the phone was wearing me out. apparently they chose her out of a class of 30 to get license. they gave her the books & 5 weeks to prepare. by herself. no teacher to watch, nobody to discuss it with, nothing but the books & her own determination to learn. she's a smart kid & wants to make something of herself. i'm impressed that she doesn't just want to sit around & do drugs like a lot of the kids these days. she got an 86 on it which i thought was pretty damn good. i invited her & lucky for dinner & told them i'd make their favorite: chili. i didn't mention i got her a brownie cake, balloon, ice cream & a few gifts like a bank to save her money in, a tote bag to haul her books in & a lunch bag to carry instead of brown paper bags. she was so tickled & it was all quite a surprise. we pulled it all off with her not being any wiser until we walked in singing 'for she's a jolly good sister'.
we've almost finished remodeling the bedroom so pretty soon i should be around a little more. painting the room with most of the furniture still in it has been slow. not only that the walls suck that paint in like a sponge. its taken 4 coats to get it the color i want it. serves me right for wanting a light color for a change. it was so dark in there you couldn't see anything even with the lights on. back when i decorated it, like 20 years ago, i was on night shift & spent my days catching up on sleep. i needed it dark then but for the last 10 years i've been on day shift & getting in bed at 10 pm instead of going to work meant the bedroom could be alot more vibrant. so i took down the darkening shades & actually opened the windows. when i did that you could see the cob webs under the bed & in the corners. yuck! you could also tell how dark the walls had turned from years of neglect. even my pictures hanging on the walls looked dark. it was ugly. now its a nice bright peach color & we're putting down white carpet! white, people! honestly, i never thought i'd be putting white carpet on my floor. over the years i've been given so many animal figures that i've stuffed in every corner i could find. now i'm thinking i can spread them out on shelves in the bedroom so they can actually be seen. when i'm done its gonna look like a mini zoo. very fitting for me. i found some really pretty giraffe print material that i'm gonna do a martha stewart button shades kind of thing. next i'll have hubby in a tarzan 'loin cloth' beating his chest & calling me jane. i've been watching painting shows on pbs & i'm thinking of adding a few vines & flowers. some of it looks pretty easy & really makes pretty decorations. we'll see.
oh, i almost forgot. in the middle of all this redecorating my friend shellbell brought me a laptop that was fried, so she thought, & asked me to see what i could do for it. its the first time i've ever worked on a laptop but i got it running in about 2 hours for her. i was so impressed with me that i did a giggle dance all around the house.
ok, i've filled you with enough bs for tonight. gotta finish my jungle room.
later.